Recognizing the manipulative traits and traps of NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder).

Why do we often need to use manipulative traits to get through life and face life's challenges? It's interesting how manipulative traits have become such an important part of living life. Even introverts person, who may prefer solitude, may use traits of manipulative to avoid a social group. For instance; feigning illness or exhaustion as a convenient excuse. by doing that so she chooses that way to avoid a social group which means she doesn’t want to come. so ya that's a choice and that's a simple example of good manipulation used in daily life. For me there's nothing wrong with that strategy. It's a good way for people to set boundaries without feeling uncomfortable for individuals who find difficult way to say ‘no’ directly, this approach provides more comfortable alternative. I think manipulation is just a natural part of human being. Some people use it for bad things, while others use it in a more positive way, without hurting anyone. We’ve all seen it in the workplace or with influencers who create a certain image to appeal to their followers. so it’s not surprising to see an influencer very different when meeting in the real life, because that is a job requires her to have a character like that, of course its in positive things. And even in job interviews, we also use manipulation to highlight our strengths and increase our chances of getting hired.

But what if someone’s manipulative traits is beyond their control? That’s when it might be related to Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). If you’re not familiar with NPD, let’s take a brief look at what it is NPD. NPD is a personality disorder characterised by a pattern of egocentric, manipulative behavior and not caring about the feelings of others.  Individuals like NPD often have some red flags and characteristics such as like needing constant praise, struggling to admit when they're wrong and they are very good at distorting the facts and making the mistake yours, then being kinda mysterious. If you're dealing with someone like this, especially in a long-term relationship, be careful. Their behavior can suck your energy and bring negativity into your life. You should be aware of the characteristics of narcissistic behavior, which can overconfidence and self-centeredness. When you first meet someone like this, they'll often dominate the conversation with their own stories, focusing on their successes and happy experiences. They rarely even won't give you much of chance to share your thoughts or feelings, and even if they do, they'll quickly lose interest in you. All they care is about themselves, and they expect you have to listen to their stories and just focus on him. They'll also brag about their possessions, no matter how insignificant they may seem. While this behavior might not be malicious, it can be a sign of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).

If you get caught in his trap, you will often find it difficult to get out quickly because he is very good at manipulating situations, he is good at making you under his control, even though you know this is wrong and you realize have to get out of this trap as soon as possible, but honestly it will never be easy. an NPD often succeeds in making his victims submit and obey all his words, he will always succeed in making you less confident, you will be made unable to move. He will often say, “ I’m the only one who truly cares about you, the only one who can be with you. No one else wants to be around you.” This is just one example of the manipulative tactics he use to ensnare his victims. By doing so, he imprisons them with his manipulative traits, isolating them from their social circle, including friends and family. sadly, this phenomenon is common both in Indonesia and globally. Victims often experience intense anxiety, depression, cognitive disorders, sleep disturbances, and a pervasive sense of hopelessness. They may also feel guilty, useless, and trapped. An NPD will derive satisfaction from their victim’s distress, further solidifying their control.

So what steps should be taken to get out of the NPD trap: To break free from the manipulative cycle, it's essential to establish clear boundaries and assert yourself firmly. Take proactive steps to distance yourself and prevent further manipulation. If necessary, seek support from trusted individuals, such as friends, family, or mental health professionals. Engage in various activities to minimize your interaction with the manipulative person. Remember, don't hesitate to ask for help when you need it and if you are already trapped deeply in it. 

When dealing with NPD, it's important to develop coping strategies to maintain emotional autonomy. Learn to manage your emotions effectively, Be brave and firm in setting boundaries, so their behavior no longer affects your emotional well-being. After breaking free, build a positive and balanced social network to provide support and distraction. but remember to maintain a healthy balance and don't let your social network or individuals control your life ever again. 

Expecting NPD to change? Don’t expect too much. Even attempting to change them through paradoxical means its even more useless. In essence, NPD is a genetically embedded trait that is difficult to alter. Trying to change its not only unreasonable but also impossible. Therefore, the only way out is to free yourself from the grip of NPD. Don’t expect more; let go and cut the rope that has bound you for so long. If you’re really stuck and can’t escape from manipulative behavior, don’t hesitate to seek professional help. Consult therapist or psychological counselor who can help you develop strategies to deal with NPD and restore balance your mental well-being. Remember, getting out of an NPD’s grasp takes time, patience, and support. Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you’re in a situation that’s harming your emotional health.

What I want to convey is that manipulation is a natural part of human being and we all have it in us to some extent. So, it’s up to us to learn about it and control it. then make sure we don’t use it in wrong ways, like NPD do. Our upbringing and childhood experiences can shape our personality and influence how manipulative we become. However, it’s good for us to be aware of this tendency and try to avoid it, so that we can build a better character or personality and treat others with kindness.