🍁 Last Autumn, Little Butterfly 🦋

      It all started when you wanted to be with me, when you wanted to get to know me again, you just kept trying to win my heart, but I always gave you disappointment. But As time goes by, your persistent heart finally melts me with your tenderness. you are so sweet, so considerate of me. and I don't think there was a single feeling of disappointment when I was with you. You always give a good impression, you always make me happy. but I don't know what makes me so doubtful of you, of your love. even though it's real you're a good man who is so gentle. and finally I looked for the root of my doubts, the root of the problem. Then I found out, it turns out it all started when we first met which made me so doubtful about life after marriage. It started when you brought someone you shouldn't have introduced to me and I shouldn't have known about it. And how can you very calmly to introduce her to me. Because that made me think again about which decision I should tak...

Why did you make me the worst girl in this story. In fact, in your tenderness, you are the one who gives more lies to our relationship. You always play with your gentle character, you always play pretty behind my back. I was stupid for always trusting you.  Without realizing it, I cried after finding out how you really were , all this time I was deceived by your gentleness. I really hate betrayal and you know it. What I regret is why this is always in the circle of my life. Did you know that this pen always accompanies me in any situation, from when I wrote back the story about our meeting and about your soft heart, to when I started to find out about the betrayal you gave me. This pen is a witness to my life, in fact, life with you isn't always easy, that fate has taken me away. I still have a long way to go to be with someone like you. I am well aware that this is no longer my time, I try to accept that you no longer love me but still I have to thank you, for me you are still my...

 When night fell accompanied by the sound of raindrops, without realizing it, my tears were falling, so I started crying because this was the right time to disguise all the sounds of my tears. In a dark corner of the room I deliberately turned it off, because I was busy crying and my painful sadness suddenly attacked me. In the silence of the night at that time, mom suddenly came into my very dark room, she was a little aware that I was hiding something, then she was about to come back out. but after that she occasionally returned to my room, coming and going to see my condition, which I am sure felt a gentle pang in his heart.  I was so amazed at how strong a every mom's feelings were and without me telling her, she knew that I wasn't doing well.  Without asking, with mother's soft and calm footsteps, she returned to my room carrying a glass containing a cup of my favorite tea. Then she came back without saying anything she just smiled and stroked my shoulder until her s...

For me, happiness is not to be sought or found but to be felt, owned and grateful for yourself. My experience  to find happiness, the more I looking for happiness, the greater the suffering I get. The more I obsessed with happiness the sadder I felt. The more I wait for happiness to come, the more I am swayed by circumstances and hesitate in living life every day and of course the further I am from being happy, I am exhausted, I am in pain, I want to be happy but I never find it even though I have tried hard to find it but still can't find the answer.    As time goes by I throw away that hope, I become more sincere in living this life, I am grateful for what I have now, I live my day with full of smile, I am no longer obsesses looking for happiness, after this what I get is real happiness, it turns out the answer is Happiness comes from living with the simplicity that I live every day. and now when I wake up in the morning my chest is no longer tight, the morning dew no l...