🍁 Last Autumn, Little Butterfly 🦋

— It's ok, I understand your situation rn, you always like that when you are in love. and I’m the one who always can handle every ur situations, as usually. I'm always calm in dealing with those situations. So that’s ok. you'll come back by urself. Just like when you're angry, I know it won't last long. Just Take your time, if you are calm, tell me at anytime like your habits, because you’ve always been like this, will always be like this. I know the clues, so call me anytime like usual. I'll always accept you whenever you come back, like always 📍Now you're like this again, you're lost so I understand that. You said we were two people like Tom & Jerry, have you ever imagined what would happen?  Ah and yes, you always say to me. “Wherever you go, your shadow will always by my side.” So when I'm lost again, please understand me for a moment. OK, I do it now, over and over again.

Hi! If this blog has reached your hands, that means my dream, my umpteenth dream has come true. Even though nothing has been easy for me to get to this stage, I am sure that all of this is just a matter of time, when beautiful things come, believe that its your time, its your part. So believe that following time will take you where it will take you. However, remain firm and confident in your heart, even if you are carried away by it, it is still your mind and yourself that are in full control of you. So basically I want to believe in you, that you have to believe in your abilities. Because every human being must have ikigai (i.e. their own abilities), so it is you who determines what you will be like in the future. This book is How I simplify my wounds which I think haven’t yet fully recovered. This book is How I always simplify Love and wounds so that I don't fall too deep if I fall and can always come back strong. OK, go deeper into my soul. Please enjoy my thoughts.

 — “If you don’t want to get hurt, you have to be able to simplify love.” That’s what my mother always said in every conversation when we were at the dinner table. Honestly, that word confused me at the time. SHe often said it when I was in 2nd grade of high school, where she began to know that I was starting to feel teenage love. and those words often stick in my head till this day. Finally, in any situation, when I get to know new love, I always simplify those feelings. And yes, it worked great, saving me from various forms of wounds. If you don’t understand the simple meaning, the point is you don’t need to overdo in love. You have to love in moderation, give in moderation. So later after that you will get a proper wound.

  I really want to close this sad story and replace with a thousands of happiness. Is it that difficult to close a wound? the fact it’s difficult. So funny when someone said. “Just go back to him even if it hurts. But the fact is that getting to know new people is more difficult.” Unfortunately; Those words are true. But there’s nothing in my story to look back on. if asked to choose between “your ex-lover or a new stranger.” I prefer the stranger, because to choose the ex and open the old book I already know how the story will end. So the conclusion is that I am not at all going back to the person in my past, no matter how much I love him. But don’t worry, I’m like this because of a problem within me that is too bandaging with wounds.

  I started to dare tell my story. My happy stories and sad stories. I started to dare to share it for a reason, Is because of my big dream of becoming a writer. And it seems like there are so many people on this universe who have dreams but they don’t dare to start and doubt themselves. Here I want to break it. break that doubt. with the way I started to express everything I feel and I want. things I like and I don’t like. something that always scares me but I managed to handle it. things that I didn’t dare to do before, now I dare. I did all that for the sake of my dream, which I will soon make it happen. If you have read this book it means my dream has come true. and now it is your part to break the doubts that exist within you, start everything and make your dreams come true.

I don’t know why I felt calm in the dark, they said I was very odd, they said I had to be checked because they were afraid something would happen to me. and yes, I had a funny experience when I was being treated in hospital. funny thing is even the nurses said the same thing they were wondering why I am so quiet in the dark when this is a hospital and I was alone in a dark room for 16 days. until one of them kept an eye on me in case anything happened so the nurse was on standby around me. Its so funny but I’ll Thankyou so much for caring me. But What’s even more absurd, they say this is like a sign from someone will die. but that’s okay, anyone would assume like that. and yes I also don’t understand what happend with me, this feeling is indeed very calming and makes me comfortable in it. all the tiredness, wounds, pain that I experienced seemed to disappear for a while.